Wow, 110 followers on Pinterest now, huh? Well, I do have something like 11.2K pins.
Fitbit thinks my resting HR is just 76 cuz I’ve only been wearing it to bed, LOL. While I’m THRILLED to be anxiety-free, I still think it’s more like 85-90, probably 90.
I’ve been doing great both physically and emotionally. I don’t know how long it will last, but I sure as hell am enjoying it while it does. Still don’t sleep all that great, and I still wonder if the sleep disorder specialist can help me, but once upon a time I doubted S could help with my anxiety yet she did. Where my other counselor failed, S was my miracle. I could go on and on about her, but as I said a while back, I prefer to leave her out of my public blogs.
Everything but my sleep has been better. I’m not as lightheaded and I don’t have as many earaches. We may never know why I was lightheaded, but what’s most important is that it stopped. Hopefully it won’t return either. The only way I could get lightheaded is if I go too long without eating.
My doctor said that (along with too high of a dose of levothyroxine) it’s a medical disorder that causes my anxiety. That means I can go for months without incident and then it could get me anytime. Usually, though, something has to be going on to trigger it or it’s physiological, so I’m really hoping my peace will last a lot longer this time. There were a few instances where I could have gone into a panic, but I think S’s EMDR has helped to prevent that.
I know I’m back to normal when I don’t mind being alone so long when Tom works long hours, but that’s to be cutting back either way.
We both had our eye exams by the same doctor that saw us last year and she said my close-up vision is a little worse, but my long-distance vision isn’t that much worse. I’m still officially farsighted where Tom is nearsighted. My OH is up a bit at 28. That’s what the air puffer said it was. She then put those numbing drops in my eyes and measured the pressure with a blue light that she said measures more accurately. Our old doc in Auburn did that. At that point my left eye was lower than last year, but my right eye was up. This could have been because I was nervous about her touching my eyeballs with objects. It only took a second, though, to get the measurements. She said she’s not super worried at the moment and that I don’t need drops.
Tom was given drops, though, for his “crying” eye. His left eye waters pretty much all the time and they don’t know why. These drops may stop that. He still has a small cataract in one eye, but it hasn’t worsened. Grow up in the desert and you’re more likely to get cataracts. Good to know I grew up a Masshole then. And that I proofread this, or else it’d read: Throw up in the desert and you’re more likely to get cataracts.
They replaced one of Tom’s broken nose pads and tightened the glasses I’m currently wearing. Just two weeks or less left with these God-awful progressives, then it's back to my bubble bifocals and purple Candies. They don’t look nearly as good as my shiny $400 designer frames, but the older I get the more I care about comfort as opposed to appearance. I wouldn’t be a size 12 if I didn’t.
I could have bought new frames, but I would rather wait and have our insurance pay for them like they do every two years. I have just the perfect pair of children’s frames picked out for next year. I prefer glasses where the nose pads are part of the frame, and these frames not only have that, but they have colors I like, including shiny gemstones on the sides.
The only negative to going back to the round bifocals is that I lose the transitions. You can only have that with progressives or lines. The lines would probably be annoying even with an antiglare coating, which I am getting. Bubble bifocals have more of a smooth transition. The only other negative to them is that I lose mid-range vision. They’re all or nothing, and yes, it is a pain in the ass to be stuck in the middle where something is too close for the long-range and too far for the close-range. That’s not nearly as annoying, however, as the “swimming” effects of the progressives. I also hate having to look through a very specific spot in the progressives to see whatever. Shift my eyes and it’s all blurry. Screw that!
I now have something like 3.5 weeks off from appointments, and I’m gonna enjoy every second of it!
It was hot, dry and gorgeous out, but it’s supposed to cool off soon.
Tom needs to get a new regulator for the passenger car window because it keeps slipping down. Either the hook or the cable is broken. Despite being in a gated retirement community, having nothing valuable in the glove compartment, and how things are harder to steal from this kind of car, I didn’t like the idea of someone being able to reach inside an expensive luxury car, so he turned it around so that that window was not visible from the road.
As I told Tammy, it’s a good thing I haven’t been very psychic lately because last night I dreamed that one of my crowns fell out. I’ve had a few trivial dream premonitions, but that’s pretty much it.
I had an awesome night writing last night. Started my book on the 5th and as of last night I had over 25K words written. I wrote for about 4 hours straight, tapping out 4550 words. Very productive and loads of fun, even if I never make another penny from it. Good brain exercise, too. Here’s an excerpt for you:
Define crazy. If you think about it, it might not be that simple to define. I supposed that each individual had his or her own definition of the word crazy. There was crazy-crazy, as in delusional. There was crazy-weird, as an odd, unusual or eccentric. Then there was crazy-mean. The thing is that no matter what brand of crazy Crazy is, Crazy can usually be sensed before Crazy goes crazy on you. Seldom do they take us by surprise, going from a seemingly normal, ordinary human being, to downright crazy and vicious in just a matter of seconds. How one simple conversation could change everything in a heartbeat was crazy enough, but as I was reminded one terrifying day, this can and does happen. Maybe it doesn’t happen very often where we’re taken by surprise and there doesn’t seem to be any warning signs, but it was true… anyone could go crazy at any moment. Anyone. And they could fool those who were typically very good at reading people, too.
I wondered just how many people existed in society that went about their daily lives on a regular basis, fooling everyone around them with how sane they appeared to be, just to snap on those that least expected them to. How many “crazies” were there that left their victims thinking how they were the last ones they ever expected to show such cruelty and commit such deplorable acts? Just how many of them never saw it coming?
I myself never saw the craziness and the cruelty behind Melanie's mask of compassion, sensitivity, kindness and intelligence until it was too late.