Slept a little better last night but still not great. Even my dreams were less violent, but also not great. I guess I was homeless in one of them. I was eating dinner with a woman and her adult son who were on vacation. I don’t know where we were but before this, we were in a gift shop and I got a small doll for $8. When we were eating, I was assuring them that I still had money. The woman asked how, and I said from selling a car.
Then I was living with my parents in another dream. I seemed to be on the second floor of our first house (or at least the one I remember as being my first). Dad was on the phone at a table or small desk that was against the wall dividing the master bedroom and another bedroom.
I entered their room telling them that I thought I had a virus on my computer. My mother followed me back into the room opposite the staircase to check it out with me, as if she would know what to do being the stupid idiot that she mostly was, LOL.
I wonder why Andy's been popping up in so many dreams lately. Is something trying to warn me about him? I will always love him as much as I dislike him, but I haven’t changed my mind and I highly doubt I ever will as far as resuming our friendship. Dump me or cause me to dump you and that’s the way it stays. If I had to start all over again I never would’ve contacted him like I did in 2010, knowing all the grief he put me through. Forgiveness has almost always backfired on me, so once you’re out of my life, you stay out.
But this doesn’t mean I want anything bad to happen to him, and having two death dreams about him can’t be good. In last night’s dream, I was crying to Tom that Andy died and he wasn’t even 55 yet. Actually, I’m pretty sure he turned 55 in February. These dreams still can’t be a good sign. They don’t necessarily mean he’s going to die, but they’re likely a sign that something bad is going on right now with him or in his life.
In another dream, he came to visit. We were so happy to see each other and were hugging like crazy. I was in the bathroom when I heard him enter the house and he started chatting with Tom. Then after I went out and we hugged each other, I told him I was glad he showed up then and not at 7am, since I doubted I would be asleep before 3am.
Went to Goodwill this morning and found a nice Indian woman and baby figurine for $5. If it’s by Ashton-Drake or the Hamilton Company like I think it is, then it was a little expensive when new.
I’m doing something different this year with CampNaNo and working on three stories at once. I do a different one each day. I set my word count at the lowest allotted (10K), but I know I’m going to beat that easily.